Old Friends

While struggling to care for my desperately ill dog, I’ve come to notice the difference between old friends and new friends. My old friends already know how devastating this inevitable loss is going to be for me. They witnessed firsthand how much my dog and I have been through, and what a comfort he has been to me.

New friends, on the other hand, require a bit more energy than I have at this depressing time. They need the back story that I don’t have the strength to give. They need not only complete sentences, but entire paragraphs. They are every bit as compassionate and caring, but they have to be brought up to speed. They have no idea what a basket case this situation has turned me into, because they’ve never seen me in basket case mode.

There is something reassuring about not having to complete your sentences. There’s nothing quite like that feeling of being understood. It’s so much easier to build a structure when the foundation has already been laid.

I’m not discounting my new friends. I have no doubt that what we will build together will be amazing, too. I just hope they can be patient with me right now.

As I cuddle with my sick dog and feel helpless, that old girl scout song keeps running through my head. “Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other gold.”

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[Image credit: pinterest.com]
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16 thoughts on “Old Friends

  1. Melvin Collins

    I feel for you Barbara, my sister has just lost her dog after a battle with cancer, I was devastated by losing two cats last year, one by poisoning probably anti-freeze by the smell of her vomit & favourite for cat haters to bait cats with & the other hit by a car which didn’t even attempt to slow down or stop afterwards according to a witness. New friends! interesting as are old friends. I’ve found that in times of trouble old friends can often disappear & you are surprised by people that that do show concern.
    The digital age for me has turned into a very time consuming affair. Your blog appears in my email along with 1700 other emails that I try & sift through for half hour a day. Environmental activism takes up more time even if it’s just writing to politicians or trying to bring awareness to people on facebook about things we should not be ignoring. Dealing with my own personal facebook page & groups that I run. Looking after myself while trying to find a job & renovate the house which I’m living in which will probably have to be sold if I can’t get a job.
    Sometimes I wonder if life would be better without the internet & the constant demands it places on you but then our paths would never have crossed.
    Take care & apologies if I miss blogs or notifications
    Mel 🙂

    1. Thanks Mel! You lead a busy life, and a fulfilling one, and it’s always a delight when you reach out with your insights, but I know what it’s like to have a lot on one’s plate, so do what feels right. And I’m so sorry about the loss of your cats.

      1. Melvin Collins

        Thanks Barbara, Life changing events like you’ve been through are equally challenging & looking after your dog is obviously really tough especially when you have so much love them. Take care, be strong. 🙂

  2. lyn sutton

    When someone with your love of words finds it a struggle to get those words out, I don’t need a backstory to understand the depth of your pain and that right now, you just need to be held. Holding you gently in my thoughts since I can’t be there.

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