Mixed Signals

When I was seven years old, I was walking into school with my best friend when a boy grabbed her arm and started dragging her down the sidewalk. I didn’t know this boy (I didn’t know any boys, really), so it scared me quite a bit. Loyal friend that I am, I started beating him in the head with my Scooby Doo lunchbox (complete with full thermos), while screaming, “LET HER GO!!!!”

Needless to say, he let her go and ran away. What I didn’t expect was my friend’s angry reaction to my rescue. Apparently I had interrupted some sort of prepubescent mating ritual. I hadn’t gotten the memo. My lunch was crushed and so was I.

This wouldn’t be the last time I misinterpreted the subtle nuances of life. Just the other day I was at a party with a friend, and she said something to me and I responded. We carried on that conversation for the rest of the event. It wasn’t until we were walking to my car afterward that I discovered we had been having two entirely different conversations the whole time!

I always find it to be quite disconcerting when I find out that my reality is completely distinct from the reality of those around me. It’s as if the universal translator in my head is set to the wrong frequency and I’m speaking a different language. I’m out of tune, out of touch. That’s an awful feeling, because my entire ego is built firmly upon a foundation of intelligence. When I realize I’m on a different page than the rest of the readers of the world, I feel kind of dumb.

It also doesn’t help that I’m prone to daydreaming quite a bit. I enjoy the garden of my mind. There is just so much to see and do there. But that doesn’t serve me well when interacting with others. Lack of focus is putting it mildly.

Let’s just say that I am forever grateful to my loved ones for their abiding patience. Thanks everybody!

garden_of_my_mind_by_aishatheweirdo-d8qm4m0
Garden of my mind by AishaTheWeirdo
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8 thoughts on “Mixed Signals

  1. OMG…that happens to me also. The first time I remember vividly, I was 9 or 10 and also was not savvy to boys and girls games but trying hard to understand. My sister who was 13 or 14 was flirting with this very cute boy from the neighborhood while we were visiting at Grandma’s. They were joking around and he turned and said something to me. I didn’t get it…I didn’t know how to respond…I looked puzzled. Apparently it was derogatory and he said something about giving him a big smack on the cheek as an apologetic gesture….I still didn’t get it. He came closer and pointed to his cheek again. So I stood on my tip toes and gave him a big smack (kiss) on the cheek. All the other kids and my sister looked surprised at my boldness and I instantly realized I misinterpreted an insult that required a response for prepubescent foreplay. ….your 4th ph says it all for me…..” I always find it to be quite disconcerting when I find out that my reality is completely distinct from the reality of those around me. It’s as if the universal translator in my head is set to the wrong frequency and I’m speaking a different language. I’m out of tune, out of touch. That’s an awful feeling, because my entire ego is built firmly upon a foundation of intelligence. When I realize I’m on a different page than the rest of the readers of the world, I feel kind of dumb.” I have now learned to say quite often “I see that so differently….”
    Thank you so much for your blog!!!

  2. This made me laugh so hard! I can totally see the image of young girl Barbara beating someone up with a lunch box!

    I also had an experience recently where a friend of mine was really trying to get me to understand a very important (to her) point, and it’s like my brain literally couldn’t compute what she was trying to tell me. Like it was outside of my code of thought. I could feel my brain trying to jump down to the layer she was trying to explain, but it’s like it couldn’t find it. Like it kept encountering a glitch and had to re-compute with no luck.

    As they say: It happens! 🙂

  3. Linda Cooke

    I keyed on the same thought that Paulette did: “When I realize I’m on a different page than the rest of the readers of the world, I feel kind of dumb.”
    No, that does not make you dumb… you are in fact encountering a higher level of intelligence! I worry for those who do not question what others see.

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